Limericks

[francoisfou]

With a head as thick as a gammon.

[francoisfou]

While on holiday once in St Kitts

[Puja]

I once caught a headful of nits

[francoisfou]

But drank loads of rum..

[Galfon]

which made it go numb

[Buggaluggs]

I concluded St Kitts is the pits



My gran was a fan of the darts

[francoisfou]

And Grandpa - the martial arts

[Buggaluggs]

She grabbed his nunchucks

[Galfon]

A fine set-deluxe

[francoisfou]

And he grabbed his wife’s private parts.

[francoisfou]

She screamed, “Get yer ‘ands off my muff!”

[Galfon]

But he just couldn't get enough

[francoisfou]

He refused to let go..

[Galfon]

so she dealt him a blow

[Buggaluggs]

With his fist, her muff he did stuff.



A Hells Angels rocker from Crewe

[francoisfou]

Took a fancy to a good-looking ewe

[Galfon]

With wellies in place

[francoisfou]

Giving the order, “Brace!”

[Galfon]

He was stunned when the animal went "moo !"



A podgy pub landlord in Chinnor

[francoisfou]

Was on a futile diet to get thinner

[Tobylerone]

His first thought was Keto..

[Galfon]

with less Burrito

[francoisfou]

But then he ate three fried Mars bars for dinner

[francoisfou]

But then three fried Mars bars for dinner

[francoisfou]

The ageing vicar of Bray