The future's bright, so give us a Kiss

[BBD]

That tin of silver polish is going to last for another 12 months at least

[SerjeantWildgoose]

Think of all the money the stadium will save on match day loo roll.

[BBD]

Fewer stewards on duty and policing could be done by a special constable with a pointy stick

[SerjeantWildgoose]

Hmmmm. Are we talking a B Special Constable? Is that not a bit of a throwback?

What about doing the policing remotely; a reservist Garda working out of Bundoran with CCTV and access to a Reaper Drone Armed with the pointed stick?

This will ensure the Bobby (Or Black Bastard, depending on your view) doesn’t slope off to the chip van thereby doubling the queue and potentially adding to the matchday loo roll bill.

[Peat]

More match day revenue from people drowning their sorrows at the bar too.

[BBD]

with Paddy J gone you know the bill for sunscreen (sunfactor balaclava) will go down

[Peat]

with Paddy J gone you know the bill for sunscreen (sunfactor balaclava) will go down

I'm sure there'll be plenty of pasty gingers in the academy ready to use the bottles he left behind.

[Spiffy]

Good win by a weakened but spirited Ulster over the Ospreys to gain a place in the Champions Cup next year. Cooney has had a great season and deservedly scooped all the player awards last week. He has been a tremendous signing. Grand way to end a terrible year, both on and off the pitch.

Jackson and Olding still have not found new clubs and may find it more difficult than predicted. Perhaps something will turn up when the dust has settled in the close season.

[SerjeantWildgoose]

Seven fecking months!!!!

Its seven fecking months since anyone posted on this bastard thread. I suppose it is to much too hope that any of ye fecking so-called SUFTUMing supporters might be dragging yer holes to Ravenhill on Friday? Eugene? Peat? McShinner (Feck no, he's another month in hibernation yet) Spiff? At least the aul hallions used til drag their arses down til buy ye a couple of pints.

I am having to rely on real friends to fill in for them and anyone whose seen me at this gig will recognise that they tend to stop being friends at all once they've had to put up with my slabber, melodious singing and pitch invasions.

[BBD]

I remember when this was all fields, lying low mainly

[SerjeantWildgoose]

Its a sad day in Yurp when the big Fleg story is not up in Belfast but down in Bath with the Ladyboy fans.

[Spiffy]

Nobody posts on the Ulster thread now, but they have managed to bumble through to the HC quarters with a messy win at Leicester, with Hendo (MOTM), Rory, Stockdale and Cooney well to the fore. Well done lads.

[SerjeantWildgoose]

I come on here once in a while to be spit-roasted and racially abused.

[Spiffy]

I come on here once in a while to be spit-roasted and racially abused.

Sadly, the days when we could discuss the Zulu connection are long gone.

[SerjeantWildgoose]

A black day indeed, Bro.

[Eugene Wrayburn]

I'd have bitten your hands off for 22 points from this group. Great work.

[SerjeantWildgoose]

Absolutely, Euge - great campaign thus far. It is a shame that the donkey you have on the wing could barely score more than one more try in the group stages than the lump hammer that Leinster have at hooker.

[Eugene Wrayburn]

Absolutely, Euge - great campaign thus far. It is a shame that the donkey you have on the wing could barely score more than one more try in the group stages than the lump hammer that Leinster have at hooker.

Thon donkey is good enough to carry our lord and saviour never mind Ulster.

[BBD]

I say he IS the Messiah! and I should know Ive followed a few

[SerjeantWildgoose]

If it’s not a personal question, are you a virgin?

Just asking, like.

[BBD]

I see Ulster have given that fella who abused Zebo a lifetime ban.......lucky bastard

[SerjeantWildgoose]

Oh FFS! I have a persistent record of hurling abuse from the terraces at Ravenhill and not even a sniff of a ban. This just goes to prove that despite cleaning up their act with the fleygs they’re still a bunch of sectarian bastards. It’s one law for the racist gob-shyte pradersants and another entirely for us witty, charming, salt-of-God’s blessed earth Kyatlics. Why the feck should I have to keep going back? This ranks right up there with The Guildford Four, The Birmingham Six and Johnny Logan not being Christmas Number 1.

Orange feckers!

[BBD]

Three thousand blokes around him have also claimed responsibility

[Eugene Wrayburn]

Three thousand blokes around him have also claimed responsibility

Lol.

Here serj, I reckon if you shout "orange bestirts" at the next game you'll get the ban you crave.

[SerjeantWildgoose]

Knowing my luck they'd give me a season ticket!