Limericks

[Galfon]

It had never been washed ..

[francoisfou]

She was always half-sloshed

[Galfon]

which left marks all over her chest.

Jacques-the-lad read this as a sign..

[francoisfou]

And opened a bottle of wine

[Galfon]

Burgundy, Grand Cru

[francoisfou]

Burgundy, Grand Cru

Château d'Yquem, too

[Galfon]

setting him up ready to dine.

'Av ye seen ma mussels!' she cried..

[francoisfou]

“What, ‘neath all that fat!”, he replied.

[Galfon]

right there, on a plate..

[francoisfou]

She screamed, most irate..

[Galfon]

..that he'd turned up late and pie-eyed.

With sauce now dripping from his brow..

[francoisfou]

'e called 'er a silly ol' cow..

[Galfon]

the next blow was quick..

[francoisfou]

On his limp Hampton Wick..

[Galfon]

It was all that time would allow.

They both hitched a ride to Biarritz..

[francoisfou]

With a grumpy old German named Fritz

[Galfon]

The surf was too small...

[francoisfou]

..and no good at all

[Galfon]

so they partied on Aperol spritz.

Through the night and into the morn..

[francoisfou]

And the next night, from dusk until dawn.

[Galfon]

Disturbed by a coq..

[francoisfou]

.and a drunken aul' jock..

[Galfon]

in their tent, all tattered and torn.

' Ahm an ma way hame fi Madrid !..'

[francoisfou]

Lay a maiden, all weak and forlorn

[Galfon]

' Ma words dinnae rhyme...'